tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-67265956878831652642024-03-19T04:38:10.076+00:00A Cup Of CreativeStephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.comBlogger174125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-83920367867453905772020-03-12T11:29:00.004+00:002020-03-12T15:34:05.744+00:00Kept for Best<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEin5qVpe5YhFDMbjAFooJsltFnAAIsqz8zaQ2jHoQIV4oyPxXmfWOF_u6gpVKOhAmvHc3Yvw8FozS_iOq5RsNi7aywxTIDs0ur9zkr_qGtxcO-_xX46AxCBM5dC3cCgfeyGOT1T9R2ALRgx/s1600/IMG_4017.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1280" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEin5qVpe5YhFDMbjAFooJsltFnAAIsqz8zaQ2jHoQIV4oyPxXmfWOF_u6gpVKOhAmvHc3Yvw8FozS_iOq5RsNi7aywxTIDs0ur9zkr_qGtxcO-_xX46AxCBM5dC3cCgfeyGOT1T9R2ALRgx/s1600/IMG_4017.jpg"></a></div>
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I've had a resurgence in creativity lately and it's shown up in a place I hadn't really expected it to.</div>
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It hasn't appeared in my notebook, or on the screen of my laptop. It hasn't suddenly shown itself in my camera lens and it isn't hiding in the scrap box of craft material under my bed.</div>
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Instead, I've found it nestled in my wardrobe.</div>
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How it found room in there to set up camp I'm not sure, but there it is, at home in between the "what-was-I-thinking" jumpsuit, the "when-nothing-else-will-do" midi dress, and the "I-just-can't-throw-it-out" polka dot t-shirt.</div>
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They do say abundance breeds abundance, and in this case, it certainly seems true. My more than abundant wardrobe has left me feeling more creative than I have in a long time.</div>
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So what brought all this on?</div>
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</div><a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2020/03/kept-for-best.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-38497870157874515052020-03-06T17:25:00.000+00:002020-03-12T15:34:05.648+00:00Chasing a BIG life - a review of 'The Interestings' by Meg Wolitzer<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghfoveeZBP-50Alxp28PTmsQHHyt94kFQEJiJc70WBh-aS2gAuMSd8AQh4N2GSzoyUZ4JALIytklNnnacYw9s_FAZkPAuYP4y8byVHATsDTZtcyFJT5fqUaDJ3I3fVaRfFBBMki_Q84I7M/s1600/IMG_3901.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1280" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghfoveeZBP-50Alxp28PTmsQHHyt94kFQEJiJc70WBh-aS2gAuMSd8AQh4N2GSzoyUZ4JALIytklNnnacYw9s_FAZkPAuYP4y8byVHATsDTZtcyFJT5fqUaDJ3I3fVaRfFBBMki_Q84I7M/s1600/IMG_3901.jpg"></a></div>
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Have you ever read a book and hated the main character?</div>
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Have you ever then realised that the reason you hated the main character is that they are, essentially, the worst possible version of yourself?</div>
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Well, that is what happened to me while reading about Jules Jacobson, and her, quite frankly, insufferable friends in Meg Wolitzer's "The Interestings." Brace yourself because I'm about to admit some pretty uncomfortable things about myself, in this terrifyingly personal post disguised as a book review.</div>
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<a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2020/03/chasing-big-life-review-of-meg.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-77437901929080043392020-02-26T12:20:00.002+00:002020-03-12T15:34:05.712+00:00Yeah, but, have you actually started writing?<div style="text-align: justify;">
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Ha.</div>
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Erm.</div>
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No.</div>
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That is it, that is the entire blog post.</div>
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</div><a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2020/02/yeah-but-have-you-actually-started.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-21907161893260556592020-02-10T19:18:00.000+00:002020-03-12T15:34:05.584+00:00Tony'sIn a bid not to instantly backtrack on my post last week, I've decided to dive right in and share a piece of my fiction writing with you today. This is a short piece from a "show" I wrote on commission a couple of years ago. I put the word "show" in quotation marks like that because it was actually a walking tour, rather than a sit-down theatre piece. Except in this walking tour, instead of telling the factual history of buildings I'd collected peoples memories. I then took these memories and wove them together. Some of the stops we made on the tour I would just retell one person's story, at other stops, like this one, I had mashed together fragments of what people had shared to paint a picture.<br>
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This was one of my favourite stories to tell on the tour. For me, this was the perfect exercise to go back and try to edit it into some sort of final piece. When I'm writing a script, which I know is only going to be read by me, it's often very much a work in progress, and the story morphs and changes every time I tell it. I'll let you be the judge of whether or not this works as a none performance piece - I can't read this in any other way than the way I would have performed it, so I'm sorry if one or two dramatic pauses or hand flourishes are lost along the way!<br>
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</div></div></div><a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2020/02/tonys.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-57635402417368931462020-02-04T20:23:00.000+00:002020-03-12T15:34:05.680+00:00Hello? Is there anybody out there?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUqppUpQVRCx1Gt4YKozhby3PMJGdDAF6hL70XAcOKmJYlvpggDdV16OhPNqptxXZL0uXWhHyWjlwZ494tDI4lhdHhPPy_0zQpBjiLhcqYpjHY6SnUX958FN_4coKFP7_zl6vGHmhmvIUN/s1600/d5b8599e-5c23-409b-a9f9-38ba4ef58184.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1157" data-original-width="1542" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUqppUpQVRCx1Gt4YKozhby3PMJGdDAF6hL70XAcOKmJYlvpggDdV16OhPNqptxXZL0uXWhHyWjlwZ494tDI4lhdHhPPy_0zQpBjiLhcqYpjHY6SnUX958FN_4coKFP7_zl6vGHmhmvIUN/s1600/d5b8599e-5c23-409b-a9f9-38ba4ef58184.jpg"></a></div>
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And the prize for least original blog post title after a hiatus goes to...</div>
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Well this is awkward, isn't it? After proudly proclaiming at the beginning of January 2019 that I was going to aim to write on my blog once a week, I managed a grand total of four posts, the last of which was practically a year ago.</div>
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I think we can all safely say, resolutions, not my thing... </div>
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So you might be wondering where I've been or even why I'm back?</div>
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Both are excellent questions.<br>
</div><a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2020/02/hello-is-there-anybody-out-there.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-90507762221827077122019-02-15T17:46:00.001+00:002019-06-18T11:49:40.056+01:00Losing Potatoes<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I've been trying to lose weight lately.</div>
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That's not something I say easily and I never use the word diet. I will say I am on a health kick - which is true I am, and of course, I want all the benefits that come with that, but the losing weight part has been and continues to be the main focus.</div>
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Admitting this to you gives me a lot of conflicted feelings.</div>
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Guilt - because I don't want to add to any sort of diet culture negativity and I know other people talking about their weight can be very triggering.</div>
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Embarrassment - because I'm not immune to diet culture and the shame it suggests you should feel if you're not the weight you, no, THEY, believe you should be.</div>
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Empowered - because while I might not be immune to diet culture and the toxicity that prevails, I am actually in a position where I feel confident with my body. It is MY body, and unless science takes some pretty huge leaps, it's the only body I will ever have. </div>
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But how can you be body confident but still want to change it?<br>
</div><a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2019/02/losing-potatoes.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-66238410410996974282019-02-01T18:10:00.001+00:002020-03-12T15:31:10.218+00:00Career/Identity<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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When I'm at parties - which is not that often because my spirit animal is a Grandma - the first thing anyone ever asks me is 'how’s work?'<br>
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Whenever I'm meeting new people in a group and someone asks, 'So what do you all do?' the people that I do know, turn to me and say 'you go first...'</div>
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Once on a super busy train, we got chatting to a group of people around the same age as us. We were all a bit drunk, and to pass the time and so that we could all ignore the fact that we sort of needed the loo, we played a game of guessing each other’s jobs. One girl was a product designer for Warburtons (but she hadn’t come up with the giant crumpets) and still my job was the one we focussed on.</div>
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And I get it. For a start, the term ‘Creative Producer’ sounds cool – even though I probably spend just as much time looking at spreadsheets as everyone else. And saying something more general like ‘I work in theatre’ makes it sound even more glamorous.<br>
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Because most people instantly think West End, backstage passes, and the possibility that I’ve met someone famous.<br>
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That couldn’t be further away from what I do.<br>
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</div><a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2019/02/career-vs-identity.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-36357387456269922182019-01-14T17:29:00.001+00:002020-03-12T15:31:57.579+00:00Switched On<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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One night over Christmas I went out with a good friend who I don't see as often as I'd like for "just the one drink."<br>
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As anyone who enjoys a tipple will know, that one drink is very rarely alone for long. 2 bottles of wine, a Martini Espresso and a can of Hoola Hooch (delicious by the way) later and I found myself quite impressively making not only my train but also the last bus home.<br>
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Now I don't know about you, but when I've had a bottle of wine, an espresso Martini and a can of Hoola Hooch I tend to find I get a little reflective.<br>
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And when I say reflective, I mean pretentious.<br>
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I know this because on the bus home I bumped into someone I went to school with and pretty sure I spent the entire journey waxing lyrical about aaaart, and theartaaah, and podcasts and how "I've just got stuff I want to say, y'know?"<br>
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I'm probably being a little harsh on myself there. In reality, they're probably the same sort of thing I would have spoken about sober. I'm not even sure I came across that pretentious really - but that's what happens when you don't realise how drunk you are until about lunchtime the next day (I actually woke up feeling great/still drunk).<br>
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So put aside the chat about art, and theatre and podcasts. The bit that's really niggling at me is the part about how "I've just got things to say." Because in truth, I'm not really sure I do.<br>
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Or at least not well-informed things.<br>
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</div></div><a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2019/01/switched-on.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-89125025956735636992019-01-04T14:31:00.004+00:002020-02-11T12:19:39.049+00:002019<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Hello and Happy New Year!</div>
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Fresh new year, fresh new motivation to write again? Well, it's not kicked in just yet, but here I am showing up and making a start.</div>
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You'll forgive me, won't you, if this post makes very little sense, is slightly too long and basically goes nowhere? Because right not I'm in the middle of not only been fully back at work but also seriously feeling some caffeine and sugar withdrawals.</div>
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I'm doing Veganuary again. Some of you will remember I first did Veganuary back in 2015, which looking back, turned out to be a bit of a turn around year for me. OBVIOUSLY, I don't link being vegan to everything big that happened that year, but I do remember that sorting out my eating habits and being generally more in tune with my body did give me the fuel to make things happen. So I'm hoping that I can embrace a bit of that energy again this year. Do a bit of a health and general-bad-habits reset and hope that that naturally spills over into other areas of my life.</div>
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Because I will admit, I've got lazy. I try to dress it up in other phrases, claim that I needed some downtime, but while that might be true, I've come to realise that there's healthy soul feeding downtime, and there's "sorry, you've watched how many shows on Netflix this year?" downtime (I haven't counted - I'm too scared).</div>
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<a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2019/01/2019.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-23611315986162588012018-05-10T11:57:00.002+01:002018-05-10T13:40:41.965+01:00Crop Tops, Modesty Ponchos & Contradictory Feelings<div style="text-align: justify;">
It's a bank holiday weekend and in an unprecedented turn of events, the sun hasn't decided that she also deserves the time off. She's shown up and she is <i>really </i>putting the hours in. People across the UK are either taking a bath in sun cream or already heating the bbq up and it's only 10am. A glorious three days off stretch out in front of us and my pasty bare legs do the same.</div>
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I pretty much gave up on tights three weeks ago. Not because it's warm enough but because my last pair laddered beyond repair and it seemed pessimistic to invest in another pack of 100 deniers.<br>
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</div><a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2018/05/crop-tops-modesty-ponchos-contradictory.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-58850764833219160492018-05-02T15:08:00.001+01:002018-05-03T13:21:09.494+01:00You're Not 19 Forever...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;">
It's Saturday night and I'm getting ready for a PROPER night out. I've got a pre-drink in one hand, straighteners in the other and I'm surrounded by what feels like 1287 outfit options for the evening. None of which are quite right.</div>
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Too short, too cold, too covered, too exposed, too young, too old. I've found a reason not to like any of them before settling on a pair of floral trousers and a white cami top. A far cry from anything I would have worn back when going out on a Saturday night seemed as natural as going to bed early on a Sunday evening now feels. </div>
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Back then it was a short dress (or a long top depending on how you look at it) and tall hair. My heels were always pretty modest but they were definitely heels and my make up involved a fairly generous amount of eyeliner. </div>
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If I'm honest I'm feeling a little apprehensive about this night out. For a start, I don't handle my drink well, and I really don't want to spend all day tomorrow throwing up. Even though I'm now really happy with my outfit the seeds of insecurity are still there, and if I water them with a vodka I'm worried they'll flourish. But most of all I'm asking myself if I'm maybe past this stage in my life?</div>
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<a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2018/05/youre-not-19-forever.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-60370569079589795032018-04-25T15:51:00.000+01:002018-05-03T13:22:06.417+01:00Things I'm Curious About...<div style="text-align: justify;">
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Last week I was ruminating over whether or not I'd <a href="https://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2018/04/have-i-boxed-myself-in.html">boxed myself in</a> by only ever really having one career focus. And with those thoughts came a feeling of claustrophobia, because even though I know, in a dream world, I would have a long and fulfilling arts career, the idea of concentrating so specifically on one thing for the rest of my life, felt daunting in a way I'd never really thought about before.</div>
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I think that's a natural reaction, and a feeling most people have in some way shape or form. Maybe you're in a job you hate and you're thinking 'I can not do this for the rest of my life' maybe you're in a job you love right now but you're not convinced you want the job that is the next level up. Everyone at some point feels a little claustrophobic about work because we spend so much of our time their and retirement age only ever seems to get farther away.</div>
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Like I say, it's natural to have a small part of you that feels a little boxed in, and so I decided to stop panicking about feeling that way, and also to stop thinking of the box as signed, sealed and delivered.</div>
</div><a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2018/04/things-im-curious-about.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-4348039771894526082018-04-18T13:34:00.000+01:002018-04-18T13:39:56.449+01:00Lessons in toughening up<div style="text-align: justify;">
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I'm not a very tough person.<br>
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People who know me very well may disagree with that. Sure I've had a couple of setbacks and always pushed through but on a day to day basis I don't feel tough.<br>
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I let things get to me. Part of that is tied up with <a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2017/11/my-anxiety-is-boggart.html">my anxiety</a> and that is something I have to recognise and handle, and part of it is just my nature.<br>
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I like people to like me and I always look for the best in people.<br>
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So when people don't like me or don't live up to the 'best' that I saw in them I take it pretty hard.<br>
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You'd think at 27 some of these lessons would have started to sink in by now. That not everyone will like you, that some people will let you down, and that some people for whatever reason (and I still like to think people have their reasons) can be plain nasty. But they seem to have been like water off a ducks back.<br>
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</div><a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2018/04/lessons-in-toughening-up.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-71621652697177412612018-04-16T08:31:00.001+01:002018-04-16T08:31:55.177+01:00Have I boxed myself in?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Good morning folks, how was your weekend? Mine was over in a flash, as they always are after a week that seems to take three months to get from Monday to Friday. But let's try not to lament too much on that fact.</div>
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I've been thinking a lot about work lately - I'd go so far as to say I've been obsessing over it. And not just in my usual 'I mustn't forget to do this tomorrow' way. In a 'bigger picture/what happens next' kind of way. Why? Because the funding for my current project is coming to an end, and as it currently stands, there's no guarantee that more funding will come.</div>
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'But wait Stephie? Didn't you say that just 6 months ago? And 6 months before that? And 6 months before that too?' </div>
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You're right, I did. Welcome folks, to working in the arts. </div>
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I know fine well, that funding dependent positions are not unique to the arts, and job uncertainty is a horrible truth about work in the modern world, but for the sake of this post I'm going to focus on the arts and the position I'm currently in.</div>
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<a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2018/04/have-i-boxed-myself-in.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-8283109371151235612018-04-09T09:23:00.000+01:002018-04-09T22:24:11.748+01:00Appreciating Your Own Expertise...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Hey everyone, I'm not sure when I will publish this post, as it is entirely unplanned, so apologies for the blunt/out of date introduction.</div>
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As I'm typing this it is 10 to 9 on a Wednesday evening. I woke up this morning puffy-eyed and exhausted, and the last thing I expected to be doing at this time when I first dragged myself out of bed this morning was sitting down to type a blog post. But then the best blog posts, quite often like the best nights out are unplanned and the words flow like shots at the student union (do the youth still drink shots?).</div>
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I woke up this morning, physically and mentally exhausted. I'm currently living above the neighbour from hell, and last night I had a bit of a freak out about my career and where it was heading so you could say I wasn't really ready to face a day of work, followed by an evening running a freelance workshop.</div>
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And yet here I am feeling inspired. So how come this day turned out so dramatically different from what was expected?</div>
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</div><a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2018/04/appreciating-your-own-expertise.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-1348912249641773422018-04-03T16:32:00.000+01:002018-04-22T15:04:25.805+01:00My Blog Was Better When My Life Wasn't...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Hello everyone, how are you? How was your Easter weekend?</div>
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I've been thinking a lot lately about why no matter how many times I set myself the goal of getting back into blogging, the urge to post just isn't there like it used to me.</div>
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During this thinking time I've come up with a number of reasons that might be causing this lack of enthusiasm:</div>
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<li>I've never really had a niche, and so it's hard to focus on what I should post</li>
<li>It's hard to start once you stop </li>
<li>I'm never sure if anyone is really reading</li>
<li>I don't know if I want to share my life as much as I used to</li>
<li>Contradictory to point 3, I'm aware that quite a few people I know IRL are reading, friends, family, colleagues - and I can't edit which version of me they see on here like you do face to face</li>
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And while all of these are things that contribute to me not blogging - these are things that I've felt since I hit publish on my first ever blog, and they never used to stop me.</div>
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So what's really changed?</div>
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Well... in all honesty, my life is just much better now than it used to be.</div>
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</div><a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2018/04/my-blog-was-better-when-my-life-wasnt.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-57788594464455680212018-03-13T21:05:00.003+00:002018-03-13T21:13:08.366+00:00Why it's important to have space to play<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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At the beginning of this year I made a vow to write here, or in a personal form, at least once a week. It only takes quick glance at my last post, and it's 'January' title to realise that I haven't exactly honoured my new year vow.</div>
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It's been an odd start to the year. Plenty of varied freelance work has come in, and that's kept me motivated and interested but I've also had one or two professional disappointments lately which has left me feeling dejected, and worn down. Outside of work there's been a similar juxtaposition. Weekends have been spent enjoying home comforts, down time, and exploring Didsbury. Week nights have been dedicated to problem solving and honouring a commitment, which in hindsight I wasn't ready to make (sorry I'll have to remain vague on that one!).</div>
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All this has left me in a funny old headspace, and while in many ways writing is my go to 'sort your head out' tool, in other ways, that too comes with a certain amount of pressure. I just don't enjoy journaling like I used to, and when it comes to <a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2017/09/why-i-stopped-blogging-why-i-decided-to.html"><strike>blogging</strike> writing on the internet</a> I feel guilty for having neglected this space so much over the past 18 months. A guilt which feeds that little voice in my head that viscously whispers 'well if you're going to post, you'd better make it a good one.' Not only that, but I feel like my writing will always be connected to my work (even if I so rarely get paid for it) making it difficult to switch off and just type.</div>
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I'm not just telling you this as some long winded excuse for my online absence but to highlight that sometimes our creative outlet isn't always the release you would hope it to be. Especially when that creativity is part of your day job.</div>
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<a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2018/03/why-its-important-to-have-space-to-play.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-82708618382184312742018-01-18T15:06:00.002+00:002018-01-18T15:06:58.194+00:00Work Lately | January<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Hey everyone, and happy just another grey and wet January Thursday...</div>
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Toward the end of last year I wrote t<a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2017/12/do-i-shout-about-what-ive-done-enough.html">his post</a> all about not promoting the work I do enough so in a bid to change that, and to give myself some sort of blog structure, I've decided to write relatively regular updates here that give a brief insight into the projects I'm currently working on.</div>
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Just in case you're new to this blog than as a brief overview, I work full time as a creative producer... which basically means I make arty things (workshops, theatre shows, gigs, festivals etc.) happen, and most of the arty things I make happen to involve encouraging people who might not normally be interested in that type of thing to get involved. I am also the annoying type of person that loves their job, no two days are the same, and the projects I work on mean I'm always trying, doing and learning something new. So now everybody is caught up, here are the projects I'm currently working on...</div>
<a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2018/01/work-lately-january.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-42134675751050133682018-01-03T11:25:00.001+00:002018-01-03T11:25:43.273+00:00Up-And-At-Em 2018<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Arial;"><span style="font-size: 14.6667px; white-space: pre-wrap;">H</span></span>appy New Year everyone!</div>
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Today is my first day back in the office, I’m make up free after a reluctant start to the day, and severely missing my pyjamas. So you’d be forgiven for thinking I’ve already ditched my new year mantra of ‘up and at’em’ but I’m still in that post-festive lull, and who said mantras had to kick in straight away anyway?</div>
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And while longing for my pyjamas might not exactly scream a go get them mentality, I am beginning to feel that New Year energy kick in (as my New Years Eve hangover, oh so very slowly, fades away).</div>
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2017 was a good steady year, but very little changed in my life. Things definitely progressed but in a slow quiet way - and while some years that’s the kind of progression you need, for a while now I’ve been feeling more like a passenger in my own life rather than the driver. And, much like with my actual driving lessons, I’m ready to get behind the wheel.</div>
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So this year my mantra is ‘up and at’em.’ And this is something I want to apply to the most every day of things, from getting up before the 87th snooze button, to pushing myself to do just one more thing on my to-do list. And while it might sound contradictory, I want to apply ‘up and at’em’ to my downtime and self-care too - rather than half-heartedly switching off, watching Netflix for hours on end, I want to do it properly.</div>
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That’s the general ethos around my mantra for the year, but here are the ways I plan on applying that mantra to specific areas of my life.</div>
<a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2018/01/up-and-at-em-2018.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-27228114518174971772017-12-01T17:17:00.001+00:002018-04-22T20:14:40.492+01:00Do I Show Off Enough?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZyiQKjNTV1TI6Kaz2MPJZfI8recO6-UiRXhzhW73woPAigA3AZtIevROJoGpdgiLrG4JOa_vIqYme3njzx1lxhTmxnUJ1qYWrEHhs7qeqFAzF5-7pRtWt7oqD8PVuSRXel_W_k0cvh8b-/s1600/IMG_20171106_075853_061.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1500" data-original-width="1200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZyiQKjNTV1TI6Kaz2MPJZfI8recO6-UiRXhzhW73woPAigA3AZtIevROJoGpdgiLrG4JOa_vIqYme3njzx1lxhTmxnUJ1qYWrEHhs7qeqFAzF5-7pRtWt7oqD8PVuSRXel_W_k0cvh8b-/s1600/IMG_20171106_075853_061.jpg"></a></div>
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The other week I met up with a friend I don’t see often enough socially, but do occasionally bump into through various work events. Not a lot of my friends actually work in the arts, even fewer of them are people I originally met at uni. This friend knows my work in theatre PRETTY DARN WELL. He actually helped a lot with the making of one of my solo shows and, not only that, but like me he also works on and off the stage.</div>
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He’s an incredibly talented guy. Some one I professionally really admire. He has this fantastic work ethic and is really well respected. He probably doesn’t know this - but in a lot of ways I find him or his CV quite intimidating. So imagine how refreshing it was to catch up with him and find that we have a lot of the same BIG questions rattling through our minds. </div>
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Anyone of those questions could be a blog pos in it’s own right - so I won’t list them all off, instead today I want to focus on just the one… Do I show off enough?</div>
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</div><a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2017/12/do-i-shout-about-what-ive-done-enough.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-38210792270692478502017-11-24T12:39:00.001+00:002017-11-24T12:39:34.191+00:00My Anxiety Is A Boggart<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Like a lot of people, I suffer from anxiety.</div>
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I don't like to use the word suffer really. Suffer sounds to me like it's something I put up with. Like sometimes I suffer from a bad hip, which is an irritation I can get on with. It also sounds too definitive and neat. It doesn't leave much room for the different levels, shapes and sizes anxiety comes in.</div>
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Anxiety changes from person to person. It's one of the things that makes it so hard to define, and like with many mental health issues, probably one of the reasons so many people resist getting help with it. 'Oh but my anxiety isn't as bad as...'</div>
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And my anxiety isn't as bad as a lot of peoples. But it's there, and it's something I've come to accept and recognise. I'm not ashamed to admit it, and it's not something I want to define me. Currently, at this point in my life, I can treat my anxiety like a food allergy. Most days it has no effect on my life, some days I have to do my best to avoid things that trigger it, and other days I have a reaction that I can't for the life of me figure what set it off.</div>
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It's that final stage I want to talk about today. When my anxiety flares up and I long for some kind of magical epi-pen... or wand. </div>
<a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2017/11/my-anxiety-is-boggart.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-27906497357518901272017-10-29T14:31:00.000+00:002018-04-22T15:04:25.841+01:00Why I'm Not "Lucky" To Work In The Arts<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh97UbzaY2J9FXYwb7jfc69Ssr5KZOq_ruoUpPT3VLHsYtRX-PuRnx7HY_nh6Mcvx3i5OP7W9bthBhw-tGwbuhM2V5wv0v5C2QS9hhPFb35PHh7AG5ukZHQncw32126y-9wGjKstdbBFBXH/s1600/IMG_20170915_151741_080.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="957" data-original-width="1600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh97UbzaY2J9FXYwb7jfc69Ssr5KZOq_ruoUpPT3VLHsYtRX-PuRnx7HY_nh6Mcvx3i5OP7W9bthBhw-tGwbuhM2V5wv0v5C2QS9hhPFb35PHh7AG5ukZHQncw32126y-9wGjKstdbBFBXH/s1600/IMG_20170915_151741_080.jpg" /></a></div>
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I work in a field that not many people get to succeed in. Full time, full paid jobs are far and few between, and the wages are minimal. It's a field you pursue because you're passionate about it because you can't imagine yourself doing anything else in, it's not a field you pursue because of the pay cheque. And it certainly isn't a career you choose because it's easy... despite what many people will have told you when you were deliberating over whether or not to take drama at GCSE.</div>
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Because of all these factors, I am grateful to have my job. I am grateful to have found a place of employment I love and one that supports me. I am grateful to have been born into a life that came with a certain amount of privilege that meant I could go to university and follow my passion, when so many people in this country, and across the world do not have that option. And I am grateful to myself for all the hard work I put in to get here.</div>
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And I will admit there are days where I can't believe this is what I get to do for a living. But when somebody tells me 'aren't I lucky to have this job' it just doesn't sit right with me.</div>
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Because put simply - loving your job does not take away how hard you worked to get there.</div>
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I didn't enter some kind of job lottery and pull the winning numbers. I started working for this when I was nine. Sure back then I had no idea that spending my weekends rehearsing for a play with a bunch of university students would lead to a career in the arts but in a lot of ways it did. In fact, the only thing about my career I put down to luck is stumbling on something I was so passionate about at such a young age. Everything after that? Was me putting in the hours.<br />
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Me giving up two nights and my weekends as a teenager to rehearse for the community panto.<br />
Me choosing to work hard at A Level so that I could prove taking Theatre Studies was worthwhile.<br />
Me getting into a great university and passing my degree.<br />
Me volunteering and gaining work experience whenever I could.<br />
Me working several jobs and an internship at the same time after graduation.<br />
Me working on minimum wage for years while work in the arts dripped in.<br />
Me refusing to give up when everyone and everything seemed to think I should.<br />
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And now more than ever, doing a job I love, means working hard. Really <i>really </i>hard.<br />
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I have had one full weekend off since the end of August. I wake up in the middle of the night with creative ideas for workshops or fears that nobody will buy tickets to an event. I stand in the middle of Lancashire towns when it's cold and wet and speak to hundreds of people about ART. I run workshops with teenagers who spend most of their time making fun of the way I laugh hoping that I make a difference to one of them. I answer work emails at night because that's the best time to get hold of an artist or arrange meetings with volunteers outside normal working hours. I live with the knowledge that funding for my job could run out within 6 months. And while I love my job, there are compromises and sacrifices that I have to make. Because guess what? The Arts? Don't come with a huge paycheck. So I work a full time and take on freelance work too so that I can live the life I want and do the job I want.<br />
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I'm not saying this to toot my own horn or to elicit any type of sympathy. I'm just stating the facts. Because I wish I knew more about how hard other people work and I CERTAINLY wish I knew more about the work behind the title when at 21 I was trying to figure out which jobs to apply for.<br />
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There are things in life we are lucky to have. I think the more of us that recognise and admit any privileges that fall upon us, the more we can do to make sure we share that luck around. But the majority of good things in life don't happen by chance and it is important to acknowledge that too.<br />
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So I'm not lucky to have a job in the arts, none of us are. But I am grateful for it, and the many many factors that contributed to me being where I am in life now, every single day x<br />
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Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-44827151330579735002017-09-26T12:28:00.001+01:002017-09-26T12:33:09.545+01:00I Didn't Get The Call...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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A few months ago I wrote <a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2017/05/is-it-really-embarrassing-to-try.html">this post</a> about waiting for a phone call and worrying that it was embarrassing to try and be a theatre maker again.<br>
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The overall message of that post was - no it isn't embarrassing to try, but then I didn't get the phone call, and when I applied to a similar opportunity a month or so after, I didn't get a call about that either. And while I don't feel embarrassed exactly, I do feel disheartened.<br>
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After only two applications I feel disheartened. Me. Who constantly preaches on this blog about not giving up.<br>
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I am a hypocrite.<br>
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</div><a href="http://www.acupofcreative.co.uk/2017/09/i-didnt-get-call.html#more"></a>Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-69202223328763300342017-09-21T15:01:00.002+01:002017-11-24T14:14:59.614+00:00Why I Stopped Blogging & Why I Decided To Come Back (sort of)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I haven't blogged since May. In that time a whole (mainly grey) British summer has passed, I've been on holiday and turned another year older, and not once had the urge to put pen to paper or words to screen.</div>
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A culmination of reasons have led to this radio silence. My last post was about theManchester attack, and ever since then, it's felt a little frivolous to attempt to come up with some sort of motivational message or optimistic slant on the world. Not because the optimism and positivity wasn't there - but because I felt like I'd rather be out living it and experiencing it with the people I loved. I've also felt for a while that I don't go deep enough with my posts, that I'm always scratching at the light and fluffy surface rather than really tackling the important things in life.</div>
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Another reason is that I've never been that good at blogging. Sure I can write and I can take a pretty good snap at instagram, but in terms of gaining followers, or writing snappy headlines or setting up promotional social media and all those other things that seem to define 'blogging success' - I suck at. I've known that for a LONG time, and I was happy doing my own thing but then I stopped knowing what my own thing was, and the whole thing just seemed a little pointless.</div>
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Couple that with the plague of negativity and bitchiness which seemed to have filled up my twitter feed over the summer months, and not only did my motivation go, but my want for it all went too.</div>
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What it really came down to was that I had nothing to say, and nothing to contribute to the endless chitter chatter that is the internet. And I was ok with that. I was busy, or I wasn't busy but I was happy to enjoy some peace and quiet.</div>
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And to some extent I am still ok with not really being a blogger. I don't miss <u><i>it</i></u> and all<i> <u>it</u> </i>seems to stand for now. But I do miss writing, and interacting with people online. I miss sharing those more long-winded obscure thoughts, that aren't really appropriate to whack in a whatsapp group chat. I miss going home to a quiet and empty flat and using my evening to order my mind, viscously tap away at a keyboard, and then find a pretty but totally unrelated picture to go with it.</div>
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I'm not sure if coming back and doing those things really makes me a blogger again. I feel like maybe we need a whole range of new words to define people who write on the internet - because I know that there are bloggers out there who work damm hard on blogging. Bloggers that not only create a blog post but share it, publicise it, collaborate for it, charge for it, spend hours scrutinising it, that truly make an art of it. Whereas me? In comparison to those artists? I'm painting by numbers.</div>
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But I think that's ok. I think you can have a blog, without relating to being a blogger. I think the internet is big and weird enough for everyone to do their own thing. So I'm back, with no plan or schedule, or label.</div>
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I'm just writing on the internet and hoping somebody reads it x</div>
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Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6726595687883165264.post-71809072348056612202017-05-25T11:21:00.001+01:002017-05-25T11:21:25.229+01:00Hold It In Your Hearts<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNzvrTqdlhQPKHKBTlt4MggdYUOaLuNsD6tw8TPfPns42n1LTSfuPowtlEB9GzAwvrdHllRmCK4F-Pt3CCrGwtQqGVNVy7jpYecuzfHSagwldMNsEW2iS7qb18eWNxXOzIQ9Bdhd1x3bxb/s1600/IMG_20160828_171737.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="901" data-original-width="1600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNzvrTqdlhQPKHKBTlt4MggdYUOaLuNsD6tw8TPfPns42n1LTSfuPowtlEB9GzAwvrdHllRmCK4F-Pt3CCrGwtQqGVNVy7jpYecuzfHSagwldMNsEW2iS7qb18eWNxXOzIQ9Bdhd1x3bxb/s1600/IMG_20160828_171737.jpg" /></a></div>
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It's not been a good week for the world. In fact I'm not entirely sure the world has had a truly good week in years, but this week in particular has hit that fact home for many of us.</div>
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Between the politics, the results that didn't go our way, the terrifying headlines and the terrorists it's becoming harder and harder to believe the world is good, that we have evolved, that dictators, world wars and inequality will ever be a thing of the past. It's been hard to get out of bed. It's been hard to look at social media without crying. It's been hard, despite wanting to out of defiance to carry on.</div>
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The Manchester attack, feels closer and crueller than any other I've lived through, despite the fact that I was on a school trip in London on the day of 7/7. It feels rawer, more real.</div>
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I cried immediately and I've been holding back the tears ever since. I cried every time I saw a plea for a missing person and every time another name was pronounced dead. </div>
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But I also cried every time I heard a story of heroism. Of the taxi driver offering free lifts, of the homeless man running in and holding a woman in his arms. I cried at pizzas being delivered to hospitals, at Sikhs showing solidarity at the vigil, at incredible poetry.</div>
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And I felt every tear roll down my face, soak into my chest and find a home in my heart.</div>
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Because it hasn't been a good week for the world, but the good is still there, and my biggest takeaway from this week is that I will hold every tear I've cried in my heart for as long as I can. So that the sad ones will be there when I hear of any attack happening anywhere, so that every act of terrorism feels as close to home as this one, so that I don't become immune to the cruelty of this world and so that with every heartbreaking headline, I remember the tears that came from the empathy and the good and the heroism that humanity has shown this week. </div>
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Because that is what the world needs now, humanity and empathy and any gleam of hope that we can hold on to. Hold it all in your hearts, remember how much an attack on your doorstep hurts and feel it when it happens half away across the world and remember for every person who committed an act of evil this week there were a hundred that committed ones of love.</div>
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To everyone out there hurting this week, I am with you, but lets carry on loving this world and one another, as much as Ariana's fans love her x</div>
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Stephie Jessophttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06028543825479817293noreply@blogger.com0